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The Memory of
THUNDERBIRD
They just won't let your childhood be, will they? Nigel Planer murdered the Magic Roundabout, "Chopper" isn't just a bike, apparently it's a helicopter, and now they've just killed Thunderbird. Oh, it's still there. But they've killed it.

It was 1988, and I was 14 when I first met Thunderbird. I started on the Blue, of course. Didn't we all? At £3.49 I could also stretch to a Marathon and a quarter of Kola Cubes. And I was happy with my Blue Thunderbird; we spent time in the park together, sometimes went to see some friends.

But after a couple of weeks the cheeky red number caught my eye. An enigmatic minx, whispering promises of dreams I had forgotten how to dream. It jeered as I bought its cheaper cousin. I was piqued. Why was it over a pound more expensive? I decided to forego the Marathon that wintry night, and cantered off to the park with a new darling.

The difference is simple; 17.5% as opposed to 13.5%. Only 4% - but it made a marked difference to my behaviour.

In conversation....

- BLUE : I talked more than usual.
- RED : I gave away military secrets.

In behaviour....

- BLUE : Became well-disposed to strangers.
- RED : Became strangely-disposed to wells.

And in belief....

- BLUE : Got happy and thought I was funny.
- RED : Got happy and became a treehouse, insisting that people climb up my leg and store their nuts in my armpits.

Mournfully, Blue Thunderbird is now 13.1% - possibly to placate an army of parents who should be encouraging their children to drink alcohol. And of course, they've got Peach Thunder, Berry Thunder and Cola Thunder. I find it difficult to sleep at night, knowing they are out there..

Take me back to the paradise city.. please.