Imagine my drooling, slackchinned joy when I received in the post an INFLATABLE FARM. From American, the home of INFLATABLE FARMS. Sixteen pills, in exciting primary colours, that you put into warm water to create an INSTANT INFLATABLE FARM.

The packet promised me sheep, farmers, and tractors. I got lobsters, grasshoppers, and a space rocket.

It's clearly a farm of the year 2525. There's still a scarecrow, though - so it's reassuring to think that in the post-apocalyptic world of Zero-G mantis-farming, some things haven't changed.

I noticed that there were no inflatable crows in the packet, though. The inflatable Scarecrow's doing a really good job.

For the purposes of the inflatable farm, it is necessary to redefine "inflatable" as "little sponges contained in pills that expand on contact with water.