| THE CYCLE OF LIFE Jesus was very nearly called Dave. And Joseph wanted to use his surname, which was Fletcher. God, however, saw that Dave Fletcher was not a good name for a messiah, and sent down a shortlist, amongst which were "Umpopo McGann", "Basilica Streuth", and "Jesus Christ". Dave is a good name. Dave. Reliable, honest, Dave. Big Dave. Big, friendly Dave. Not too bright, but he gets the job done. By any means necessary. The cycle of life is very fast, in God's terms. God has been around since forever, so he can take his time over things. For instance, when God blinks, it is like the big stone doors in Indiana Jones temples. One very important difference is that you cannot reach into God's eyeball to snatch back your hat - you have to knock on the front door and ask for it back, properly.
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